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The Brokenness of Divorce

Marriage is a symbol of love and commitment. But, what happens when the ever-dreaded “D” word comes up? Divorce affects nearly 40 to 50 percent of couples in the U.S., according to the American Psychological Association. Divorce does not play favorites…it destroys the marriages of many mature Christians, young Christians and non-believers.

Today’s blog is focusing on the brokenness of divorce and how the Bible and our everlasting Father, offers hope for better days ahead.

To start, let me just touch on a few thoughts you may feel as you navigate through your divorce:

            The hurt is beyond measure.

            Feeling that things will never be normal again, or that I will never feel OK again.

            What did I do wrong?

            Deep down I still love him / her.

            I feel like such a failure.

            Will I ever trust again?

            I want my ex to feel the pain I feel.

            Why can’t I just go on with my life and snap out of this?

You may even be wondering, “Why did God let this happen, does he not care about me?”

Well, did we touch on any of the thoughts you’ve been experiencing? We know firsthand there is a roller-coaster of thoughts, feelings and emotions that could be expressed concerning this painful topic, but if we could choose one word to sum it all up, it would be - broken.

What many people don’t consider, especially close friends, is that you are grieving. Yes, grief! This word shares many emotions. Please don’t miss understand this, I have experienced both the loss of a spouse through a divorce and also through death. I would never walk into a Grief Share class at our church in Hermitage and say that a divorced person’s grief is greater than the grief experienced by someone that has lost a spouse to death – never would I say that! But, grieving is a loss! Think about it…you have lost the person you had planned to do life with. You have lost family (in-laws) and some friends, even financial security. Schedules are now changed, what once was dinnertime becomes a time of reminding you that now you are alone. Single parenting is now in the forefront as you try to juggle the kid’s schedules and meals. The pressure and struggles can quickly become overwhelming.

Another big component of the pain that you may be experiencing is fear – a fear that this pain may not be momentary but might settle as a permanent condition, an overwhelming and unmoving cloud cover, or that the hurt is so bad that it will never let go.

Friend, I can tell you first hand there is hope! While believers are sustained in their suffering by hope, we also are sustained in our weakness in the most special way. Let us take a moment to see what the Bible has to say about how the Lord offers his undeniable support through heartache and pain:

The Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express. (Romans 8:26)  


Remember the Psalmist said, “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted.” (Psalm 34:18)

While you may be feeling a roller-coaster of emotions, fear not and never, ever forget that God has a plan for you, even in the midst of your heartbreak.

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord.  “Plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. (Jeremiah 29:11)

If you would like to learn more about how the Lord helps those that are hurting, we invite you to join us at New Hope Baptist Church in Hermitage. You can view worship times and locations by visiting our website here. Or, you can submit a prayer request for your time in need.